To My Pro-Vax Friends and Family

To my pro-vax friends and family,

First, thank you for even clicking the link. You know who you are, and for the most part, I know who you are. I know you think you know what’s best for all the kids out there, and see the “science” plastered out there on how one child in Orange County, CA died of whooping cough earlier this year. In fact, there’s a chance you even thought of all the pro-thought/pro-rights (or anti-vax as you call it) posts when you read a headline about an “outbreak.”


You know, I think of things too when I hear these cases. Sometimes I wonder, about who that child was exposed to, and mostly I wonder how many “fully vaccinated” individuals were damaged getting the vaccine and later still came down with something dreadful.But, here’s the thing. We’re all people. We all are out there for the same thing: keep going with what we believe is right for our family, and, really, for those around us as well.


  • Did you know that most of my friends who choose to delay vaccines or not do any vaccines, actually have researched beyond Jenny McCarthy and Wakefield?
  • Have you considered that in freedom, we also believe in responsibility?
  • Almost every person I know who doesn’t vaccinate either breastfeeds or gets donor breastmilk for their babies, and most breastfeed for the full “WHO” term of two years, if not more?
  • Did you also know that most are extremely conscious about where their children go on a regular basis, what their children eat, and what they do not eat? They are concerned parents.
  • We may just believe in maintaining and boosting health in a different way than others.


    Those of us who may not choose to follow exactly what the government agents, most of whom are ex big-pharma big-wigs or future ones or have other conflicts of interest, indicate is “best” do not wish to have your child or you come down with some random illness.



    We also do not sip on antibiotics on a weekly basis. After all, over use of anti-biotics help cause the resistance of bacteria to the drugs, causing the need for more and stronger medications, when, perhaps, some (most?) of us didn’t need that medication in the first place.



    (Let’s not forget that this week there was more information on how great breastmilk is and how breastmilk KILLS super bugs like MRSA better than all those chemicals out there, oh it appears to kill cancer cells, have consideration in cell regeneration due to stem cells in breastmilk and more too)

    Breastfeeding has benefits outside of calories and a few vitamins. really.


    But it is hard to make money off breastmilk. Okay, I am trying really hard to not be snarky here.


    For those of us who do a delayed or selective vaccination schedule, with every shot we give our child, we’re not thinking of autism. Really.


    We’re thinking of the tainted vaccines, the recalls, the SV-40 virus found first in polio vaccines, and now found in a high percentage of today’s cancers.


    We’re thinking of the myriad of reactions that are KNOWN, and the ones that are generally not attributed to the vaccine since there can always be a perfect storm of something else going on… making pin pointing what caused the “issue” nearly impossible. We are thinking.


    Here is a PDF of “reportable” vaccine events put out by the US government – plus all the other things in the insert booklet of each individual vaccine. You know that insert that we aren’t offered before an injection is given. Imagine that as full disclosure.

     (Side note: Report ANY reaction to a vaccine. Of course, when you’re injecting 2, 3, 4, 5 different shots, with what…8 different “miracles” at a time, you can’t really pinpoint WHAT caused the issue, right? But please, change won’t happen without reporting. )

    Let’s look at some of those side effects that, for a disease that may or may not be generally too serious,

    According to the CDC, a rare reaction for the MMRV (Combined shot of Measles, Mumps, Rubella and Varicella) is:

    • Seizure caused by fever (about 1 child in 1,250 who get MMRV), usually 5-12 days after the first dose. They happen less often when MMR and varicella vaccines are given at the same visit as separate shots (about 1 child in 2,500 who get these two vaccines), and rarely after a 2nd dose of MMRV.

    Let’s look at what the CDC says about Varicella (chicken pox) vaccine:

    • Mild rash, up to a month after vaccination (1 person out of 25). It is possible for these people to infect other members of their household, but this is extremely rare.
    • Note: The first dose of MMRV vaccine has been associated with rash and higher rates of fever than MMR and varicella vaccines given separately. Rash has been reported in about 1 person in 20 and fever in about 1 person in 5. Seizures caused by a fever are also reported more often after MMRV. These usually occur 5-12 days after the first dose.

    Are we worried? Yes! Are we a bit confused as to why we want to risk putting in toxins into our children when the vaccine itself can cause the exact symptoms they’re supposed to prevent? Absolutely. Are we not vaccinating so that we can cause an epidemic? Fuck no. Talk to the labs that cross-breed flu viruses in China, and who knows where else.


    Yes, those of us who have seen our children seize, or cry for hours on end,  unable to comforted while their body was unable to process why exactly they were in pain or their brain was swelling from vaccine-induced encephalitis we’re the ones to truly be worried about in today’s super-bug era.


    What do you say to parents who’ve had children stop speaking after MMR vaccine and then told that it was likely developmental due to other household changes. Can you not see how torn we are on doing what someone else is telling us is right and what grips at our hearts as parents?


    What do you say to those parents when you say “all children who can be vaccinated should be vaccinated” are those the “can be?”

    For the seizures, most doctors will recommend no more of “that” vaccine – but since most vaccine inserts indicate fever as a common side effect, how do we know another vaccine won’t cause another seizure? After my daughter screamed in pain for hours at only a few months old, our pediatrician didn’t recommend that vaccine again for over a year. My husband are the only ones who know that she didn’t cry before that vaccine reaction? She was always easily comforted, had never screamed, ever.  But before a vacation to California and an “outbreak,” we were scared into doing it again. Was it her age that changed her? Did anyone else notice how her smiles were fewer? We’ll never know.


    Those of us who have stopped vaccinating for diseases that are generally non-deadly, we’re not irresponsible. We don’t just read propaganda  Most of us have read books by trusted MDs, gone into NIH archives, talk to MDs in depth, visited naturopaths for alternatives, visit chiropractors to prevent the need for more antibiotics for an ear ache that is actually viral when the pediatrician wrote a prescription for an antibiotic. We’ve done our research and said, you know what, it isn’t for us. That risk just isn’t worth it for our family. And boy, we say, am I glad I live in a place where we are free.


    I mean,

    Would the same vaccine promoters feel okay to say the same negative thing to a mom about breastfeeding? No, because that’s taboo. 

    Parents don’t get their children taken away for not breastfeeding. Parents do get CPS called on them for not vaccinating. Valid or not, it happens. Many people believe it is against the law to not vaccinate. There are school shots – but even those, in almost all states, aren’t law. There’s no law to breastfeed. There are guidelines. But doctors hand out formula, even though they’re supposed to be recommending the medical guidelines of breastfeeding for 6 months exclusively, 12 months and then as long as mutually agreeable (or per WHO code, 2 years is recommended). Ironic?


    So, when you comment that those of us who may not follow federal recommendations are irresponsible or damaging our children, consider this a part of freedom.
    Cannot live with regret, if we're confident in our decisions

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    1. you know, you’re right. and i’m choosing to actually publish your comment, in spite of the fact that you clearly didn’t read the post to see that the point is nothing about degrees or right or wrong, but about individual RIGHTS and the ability to make decisions.

      Can someone who hasn’t studied nutrition talk or make decisions about food?
      Can someone who hasn’t studied civil engineering decide to not take a cracked up, pot holed road when they see a perfectly fine alternative?
      Can someone who hasn’t studied lactation make decisions on breastfeeding? (Because we know most MDs take very few courses on nutrition, and little if any on the science of breastmilk, but they sure get “education” from formula companies!)
      Can Someone who hasn’t studied structural engineering decide to not buy an apartment from a company who, in the past, made structurally unsound building decisions in the past?

      So other trolls out there, please, read what we have to say before making nasty comments.

  1. What a fantastic article! I’m so glad you wrote this. I have posted it to my Facebook wall. If only people would stop blindly trusting doctors and do their own research. I’m so grateful for those of you who cared and were brave enough to share information like this. As a result, my son is intact and 100% vax-free. Thank you. :-)

  2. I love this piece, it mirrors many of my feelings on vaccination and how I share this information with others. Thanks for writing it!

  3. I say if, as a parent, you feel 100% sure that you can handle the death of your child because of something that COULD have been prevented, it is not my place nor anyone else’s to take away that decision. However, if you are the type that can’t put aside the “what ifs” when bad things happen (and they do happen to both vaxed, non-vaxed, and delayed vaxed kids), it may not be for you. My two cents from a delayed vaxing parent….

  4. Hi. Your post suggests antibiotics cause bacteria to mutate. This is inaccurate at the level of science that gets taught to 15 year olds in my country. It’s therefore possible that though you have done “research” into vaccination, you haven’t understood it nor gained an accurate understanding of what matters and what doesn’t when it comes to balancing risk. Your caption under the photo of breastfeeding ends by suggesting there are fewer benefits than we know, and the sentence in large font, your most emphatic point, doesn’t make sense. I am curious as to how a chiropractor is of any use for a viral infection – that just sounds like a complete waste of time and money.

    1. I read through and see where some may see it as misleading. Over use of antibiotics, even you must admit, causes bacteria to resist, causing the need for harsher antibiotics.

      Like morals, determining individual risk is just that, individual.

      New Zealand is a pretty “free” country, so I’m sure you understand the need to have the ability to make decisions based on personal risk and personal history.

      I only started seeing a chiropractor a few years ago, and like you, didn’t understand how a chiropractor could help anything but back pain, but, some things we don’t “see” – the spine holds a lot in us and can really affect a lot of our health when we’re out of alignment. Since I haven’t done a lot of research nor am I a chiropractor, nor have I talked to chiropractors in depth about how it works (like I have talked to MDs about vaccines), I can’t attempt to truly explain it. Here’s an article that isn’t “unbiased” but since there aren’t lobbying organizations giving NIH and CDC money to research it, you’ll either have to take their information or be fine with what you’re currently doing.

  5. I have talked to a professional with a phd in immunology and virology. He does not benefit from vaccinating your children. After speaking with him I choose to vaccinate my child. These viruses are not common in the us because of vaccinations. You go to a third world country and its an issue. I am educated on the matter. I do not want my child getting one of these viruses. Therefore I vaccinate

    1. I am glad you have that choice. That’s the point, choice.

      Those of who do not vaccinate or delay vaccinations, or decline specifics (perhaps due to religious beliefs and the use of aborted human tissue), do not want any one to get sick with anything. Instead, they take precautions, even when travelling – (soap, use of high nutrient food, not allow people to tough their child’s faces, etc).

      They may also feel that some of the diseases are not very risky to get for their otherwise healthy child so they take the risk of getting the disease over the risks associated with vaccinating (so for example, risk of seizures versus the risk of actually getting the disease.

      Luckily there in NJ you have the choice to vaccinate or not vaccinate, at least until your child goes to a public school, then NJ is a more restrictive state.

      I personally have witnessed my own baby screaming for hours after a vaccination. I personally know a child who stopped talking after their 18 month MMR, saw the child before, saw the child after. Major difference. But, no one wants to know if MMR actually caused it, so it becomes anecdotal. I know many children who have had seizure activity post vaccines. Some were pinpointed to vaccine, others were “can’t be ruled out.”

      Those of us who make choices other than the list prescribed due so because we want change for ALL children. Safer vaccines, more research on alternative disease prevention. More health.

  6. I’m glad you wrote about this. I am in the process now of going through a lot of information since I have chosen to no longer vaccinate my children. My oldest which is twelve has had a ton even though when he was younger, I always felt bad vaccinating him. I just did not have enough information to make the right decision.

    Now that I do, I plan to write a post on my decision and reference this article. Good Stuff!

    Thanks for Sharing.

  7. U.S. infant mortality rate was 29.2 per 1,000 live births in 1950, before the majority of the current infant vaccinations were available. (And, incidentally, when there was a much higher percentage of the population breastfeeding.) Fifty years later, in 2000, the U.S. infant morality rate was 6.9 per 1,000 live births. I’m sure there are other factors that are part of this radical reduction in child infancy. But I have to believe that vaccinations have played a large part, as well.

    1. You are right, infant mortality has decreased. Here’s a CDC listing of reasons, which include a huge variety. CDC attributes vaccines to a small portion:

      uring the late 1960s, after Medicaid and other federal programs were implemented, infant mortality (primarily postneonatal mortality) declined substantially (5). From 1970 to 1979, neonatal mortality plummeted 41% (Table 1) because of technologic advances in neonatal medicine and in the regionalization of perinatal services; postneonatal mortality declined 14%. During the early to mid-1980s, the downward trend in U.S. infant mortality slowed (6). However, during 1989-1991, infant mortality declined slightly faster, probably because of the use of artificial pulmonary surfactant to prevent and treat respiratory distress syndrome in premature infants (7). During 1991-1997, infant mortality continued to decline primarily because of decreases in sudden infant death syndrome (SIDS) and other causes.

      Although improvements in medical care were the main force for declines in infant mortality during the second half of the century, public health actions played a role. During the 1990s, a greater than 50% decline in SIDS rates (attributed to the recommendation that infants be placed to sleep on their backs) has helped to reduce the overall infant mortality rate (8). The reduction in vaccine-preventable diseases (e.g., diphtheria, tetanus, measles, poliomyelitis, and Haemophilus influenzae type b meningitis) has reduced infant morbidity and has had a modest effect on infant mortality (9). Advances in prenatal diagnosis of severe central nervous system defects, selective termination of affected pregnancies, and improved surgical treatment and management of other structural anomalies have helped reduce infant mortality attributed to these birth defects (10,11). National efforts to encourage reproductive-aged women to consume foods or supplements containing folic acid could reduce the incidence of neural tube defects by half (12).

      Breastfeeding rates in 1950 were lower than today.

  8. Great article. We don’t vax and it’s insane how many people think they have a right to tell me how we should raise our children. We have done more research on vaccines then the average doctor, so I feel confident in our decision.

    1. Thank you Crystal- you do remind us that we, as parents, do not just decide to be “difficult” but because we want what is best for our children. Take care.

  9. You write in your post, “Those of us who have stopped vaccinating for diseases that are generally non-deadly.” Could you clarify what diseases you consider deadly and which ones are not?

    1. Jaclyn – each of us has our own viewpoint of risk. For some, who perhaps do not travel and perhaps homeschool, they likely do not come into contact with things like polio (which has a death rate of less than 1% even in locations where water quality is horrendous and soap isn’t used) or perhaps TB (which is something offered as a vaccine for in Asia and such, but not in the US).

      So often it is a balance – look at 1) risk of contracting said disease and 2) risk of having permanent damage/death VERSUS risk of contracting disease from vaccine and the risk of side effects from said vaccine.

      Again, for those of us in states/countries where we have choice and freedom, that is what we want. We want to be able to balance risks rather than from corporate recommended risk mitigation, from which they benefit. It costs a lot of money to create a vaccine, so of course, they want to have it out on the market and consumed readily, even if, like the chicken pox vaccine, it was originally funded to help protect a “select few” – not everyone like today. And since we have the chicken pox vaccine, we have more people at risk for shingles… so what do we have now? A shingles vaccine! We do not want a one size fits all when there is a lack of transparency or lack of checks/balances.

      Parents wouldn’t have to utilize the right to freedom if risks were mitigated AND companies could be sued for faulty vaccines.

      Today, companies cannot be sued for a death caused by a vaccines or for brain damage caused or anything else. The lawsuits that have been won in the US – that cash “compensation” comes from a surcharge/tax paid by each vaccine taken. Thus, the companies have no reason to make things better, except if it is large enough an issue that the FDA would require a recall.

      Many parents do not want their child guinea pigs for vaccine trials either. There’s no safe way to test vaccines on children so often, children are the ones hurt with new vaccines. Just look at the need to reformulate the rotovirus vaccine back in 1999. Look at the change in the Polio Vaccine that “possibly” is the cause for what, 60% of today’s cancer.

      Plus, many of the diseases are “low risk” with proper hand washing, clean water and proper nutrition.

      Of course, you can die from a cold, die from a fall, die from practically anything. We can only do our best with each individual situation

  10. While I think sometimes your attitude is mean– I’m sure it’s because you’re so defensive of your decisions and constantly having people question them– I think you raise a good point. Until this point, my children are current on vaccinations. But this article has made me reconsider that. In the back of my mind, I have always worried about adverse reactions. Two weeks ago, my son was sick– fever, throwing up. The next day he had a scheduled well baby. I questioned the dr about whether we should wait on his vaccinations since he was sick. She insisted that since he didn’t have a fever right at that moment that he would be fine. I regret letting them give him his vaccinations. He was already fighting something off so his immune system was down and then they injected him with all of those other viruses. He’s STILL sick– fighting off a simple cold that all of us have been over forever. He is still running a fever off and on. The day of the injections he had terrible site pain. He cried constantly for 2 days.
    Since then, I have been doing a bit of my own research. I found this website that day–during the diaper hunt. I don’t think he will be vaccinated anymore. My daughter is done too. I used to think that if something happened due to vaccinations that it wouldn’t be that big of a deal– vaccinations are for the greater good of the community. Why should I risk my own children’s safety for the safety of other’s people’s children??

    1. Your research is selective and you are the prime example of the coffee-club first-world mama who hasn’t watched anyone suffer from diseases. Tell me, which of the 14 infants that died in 2012 deserved it (whooping cough btw)? How about the children who have gotten SSE from measles? Yes, there are reactions to vaccines. No pro-vaxxer worth their salt would deny it. The difference is, we know that while you might get trapped in your car by wearing a seatbelt, the *facts* are that it is far more likely to save your life. The big gulf between seatbelts and vaccines is that your choice to not vaccinate is ultimately selfish. Are you really comfortable with an immuno-compromised child dying from a disease that could have been prevented?

      To throw around the claim that the government is a basically a big Pharma shill is to buy into a conspiracy the likes of which have never been seen. The CDC, the WHO, scientists from around the world, medical professionals… all of them duped over the course of a century by “Big Pharma” (who btw, make less than 2% of their profits from vaccines – and what a brilliant business plan, to vaccinate a disease out of existence and then… not need the vaccine anymore).

      I know I can’t convince you. You’ve got your pride and your so-called facts and you want a 100% safe vaccine despite the fact that nothing is 100%. I wasn’t pro-vax until I realize that this group that you’re part of was starting to threaten children’s lives. In the middle of a pertussis epidemic, with babies dying from a disease they don’t have to die from, people like you are sitting around acting like this is no big deal. It is a big deal. And I wish I could make you hear me. I desperately wish you would see the pain the anti-vax movement is causing.

      I read the risks and I decided I love my children and I love my friends and I love those with compromised immune systems and I love those who need me to be part of the herd. In the end the only sources for not vaccinating were people like you with zero science and whole lot of missing the point.

      I vaccinate because vaccinating saves lives. It’s not the only thing that saves lives but it’s a HUGE piece of the pie.

      1. Thanks for your post. But if you read my bio you’ll see I’m currently living in the “third world.” I get to see kids who are affected by horrid conditions. I get to worry about the fact that there is live polio in the water here, one that causes more polio than the disease itself.

        The other part you clearly didn’t read is that I do vaccinate against diseases we are at risk for.

        Next you’ll tell me, “I was vaxed and I’m fine.” But you won’t look at what you were vaxed for or the schedule to see the differences.

        You’ll also likely see that dosage of a medication is important but fail to see that the same vaccine dose for a newborn is given to an adult.

        But you are right, I do love coffee.

        1. I don’t think anyone should change their mind based on a blog. BUT I do think we need to realize the huge issues, the money changing hands and the fact that vaccines are the “one” medication (preventive?) that you cannot sue the manufacturer of… How does that make sense?

          If I open eyes and it makes changes to policy, I will be happy

  11. I work in the ID/AIDS research center of a major Boston hospital, and non vaxing is just not safe, period. We are a non profit, there is no gain from studying for a possible vaccine against the HIV virus. Most of these doctors want to help people. And help they have. Studies done linking vaccines to autism have been proven bogus. The benefits far outweigh the risks and that is how the ultimate decisions are made. The is a public health/safety issue, not one of civil liberties.

    1. You are a non profit but where does your funding come from? Who selects what moves forward?

      Again it isn’t “just” autism. When there are known neurotoxins which can cross the blood-brain barrier, we should wonder. Why is it that vaccine makers are protected from lawsuits? They also are not required to disclose risks… why?

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